Yogiism
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A Yogiism is an amusing speech error or paradox of a kind associated with Yogi Berra, a baseball player. Similar utterances are called 'Colemanballs' in the UK and 'Cruijffiaans' in Holland).
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[edit] Examples
- It ain't over till it's over.
This quotation is undoubtedly the best-known Yogiism. However, what he really said was You're never out of it till you're out of it in regard to the 1973 National League pennant race.
- I want to thank you for making this day necessary.
This was said at Yogi Berra Day in St Louis in 1947. It is supposed to be the first Yogiism. By his account, he asked teammate Dr. Bobby Brown to write a short speech, and he misspoke, replacing the word 'possible' with 'necessary'.
- It's like déjà vu all over again.
Many people think that Berra would have never said the word déjà vu, as it wasn't his kind of language. But Yogi himself claims that he said this in reference to home runs by Roger Maris and Mickey Mantle, who often hit homers.
- When you get to a fork in the road, take it.
Berra has claimed that this is part of some driving directions to his house. In his hometown of Montclair, New Jersey, there is a fork in the road and either way you take, you will get to his house. Some people find this to be a very poignant quotation, thinking it means that when you find a challenge, overcome it.
- It gets late early out there.
During day games at Yankee Stadium, the left fielder is forced to contend with a low sun for the last several innings. Berra was referring to the difficulty of playing the position in the late afternoons.
- I never said half the things I said.
Yogi can't even escape creating a Yogiism in his disclaimer for not creating all of the Yogiisms. He was pointing out that he didn't say everything that people think he said, which is very likely.
- It's so crowded nobody goes there anymore.
This one may have been invented by someone else. Yogi said it regarding Ruggiero's, a restaurant in St. Louis where he and Joe Garagiola had worked as waiters, which had become so popular that his old friends couldn't get in anymore.
- Tomorrow night is another day.
Yogi said it when his team lost a night game. He knew they would play better the following day.
- We have a good time together, even when we're not together.
This quote was talking about his wife Carmen. Apparently it makes perfect sense to them, and it means that he likes to spend a little time away from her, but wants to be back together after it.
- Our similarities are different.
This quotation was actually said by Dale Berra, Yogi's son. It's interesting to note how similar they are in their linguistic qualities.
- I thought they said steak dinner, but then I found it was a state dinner...
- ...It was hard to have a conversation with anyone; there were so many people talking.
This was about a fancy dinner he attended at the [White House].
- We made too many wrong mistakes.
This quotation was about his team, the New York Yankees, when they lost the 1960 World Series to the Pittsburgh Pirates.
- In theory there is no difference between theory and practice. In practice there is.
This was quoted in the introduction of the book Secrets and Lies by Bruce Schneier.
[edit] Other quotes
- "Slump? I ain't in no slump... I just ain't hitting."
- "You can observe a lot by watching."
- "A nickel ain't worth a dime anymore."
- "If I didn't wake up, I'd still be sleeping."
- "I usually take a two-hour nap from 1 to 4."
- "If you don't know where you're going, you'll wind up somewhere else."
- "The future ain't what it used to be."
- "If people don't want to come to the ballpark, how are you gonna stop them?"
- "Always go to your friends' funerals, otherwise they won't go to yours." (This was reportedly said by Yogi after arriving late to practice so that he could attend the funeral of a friend who had died.)
- "You have to give 100 percent in the first half of the game. If that isn't enough, in the second half, you have to give what is left."
- "Never answer an anonymous letter."
- "Think?! How the hell are you gonna think and hit at the same time?"
- "Why buy good luggage? You only use it when you travel."
- "Ninety percent of this game is mental, and the other half is physical." (A variation on this is, "Ninety percent of this game is half mental.")
- "Prediction is very hard, especially when it's about the future." (this quote as also been attributed to Samuel Goldwyn and to Neils Bohr, in the latter case the quote's premise is said to hinge on the deep semantic difference between prediction and forecast)
- "The first 90% of any trip takes 90% of the time, and the last 10% takes the other 90%."
- "Short catchers are better. They don't have to stand up as far." (Speaking of the young catcher Craig Biggio)
- "I've double-checked it six times."
- "What time is it? Do you mean now?
[edit] In context
When asked what makes a good manager of a baseball team, he said "A good ball club".
When asked what time it is, he said "You mean right now?"
When he was asked if first baseman Don Mattingly had exceeded expectations, Yogi said "I'd say he's done more than that!"
His wife Carmen asked where he would like to be buried, and he said "Surprise me!"
He was told by the wife of the Mayor of New York that he looked cool in his summer suit, and he said "You don't look so hot yourself."
At a dinner in an Italian restaurant, he was asked how many slices should be cut in his pizza, and he replied "You better make it six, 'cause I don't think I could eat eight."
While he was a guest on a radio show (with fellow Hall of Fame member Tommy Lasorda), the subject of epitaphs came up. Yogi quipped that his epitaph will read "It's over" — a reference to the quip "It ain't over 'till it's over," which is often attributed to him.
"I don't know if it's good for baseball, but it sure beats the hell out of rooming with Phil Rizzuto!" & dash; On hearing team-mate Joe DiMaggio was to marry Marilyn Monroe.
In 2003, while attending a Yankees game, Yogi was quoted as saying, "Boy, I hope I never see my name up there," as the names of Yankee greats who died in the previous year were flashed on the scoreboard.
[edit] In advertisements
Television commercials have taken advantage of Yogi's fame in speaking, specifically his Yogiisms, and advertisers have scripted some things for him to say that, though not true Yogiisms, are similar to his malapropisms.
In an Entenmann's commercial, Yogi said, "You can taste how good these cookies are just by eating them" and "this box is always open until it's closed."
In a print advertisement for the Yankees' YES Network, Yogi said, "I love the YES Network so much, I don't watch TV anymore."
In an AFLAC commercial, Yogi is at a barber shop.
>Yogi (to barber): Not too close. You think I got that insurance?
>Man next to Yogi: What insurance is that, Yogi?
>Aflac Duck (kicking door open): AFLAC.
>Yogi: The one you really need to have. If you don't have it, that's why you need it.
>Man: Need what?
>Aflac Duck: AFLAC.
>Yogi: Well, if you get hurt and miss work, it won't hurt to miss work.
>Aflac Duck: huh?
> Yogi: And they give you cash, which is just as good as money.
In a commercial for "J&R Music and Computer World" he says, "Their customer service is so helpful and their prices are so low, you can't afford not to go there."
[edit] Nature of Yogiisms
Yogiisms should not be confused with Farberisms [1] (popularized by Prof. David J. Farber). The former are typically either pleonastic or oxymoronic redundancies, while the latter are most often non-sequiturial mondegreens, though both usually share the goal of making a point through surreally humorous, absurdist mis-use of language, especially the alteration of clichés through malapropism and mixed metaphor.
[edit] See also
- Colemanballs, which is how many British people would refer to 'Yogiisms'.
- Cruijffiaans, which is how many Dutch people would refer to 'Yogiisms'.
